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The day after the season ends, I slip away for a quiet and much deserved break. The luxury hotels of Dubai are not for me and I am no enthusiast of the Ibiza party scene. Instead, I take a crate of scotch to a small cottage in the Scottish Highlands and for seven days I walk and I think and I drink and I do some crying and when I come out, I feel okay again.

For whatever reason, the overwhelming feeling of the Everton supporters is that I should stay here, entertaining thoughts only of 2017/18 and absolutely not of 2025/26. At least not until they fix the bugs.

Do they genuinely believe that I can build on the success of the first season? Are they actually just hopeful of an inevitable second season collapse and subsequent public breakdown? I guess we’ll all find out together. But the mood has certainly changed now.

Qualifying for the Champions League (play-offs, but still…) and winning the Manager of the Year award has really changed people’s perception of me. No-one sniggers when I pass them in the corridor now.

Last year, I had to sack my assistant manager Erwin Koeman because he was horrible to me, Yannick Bolasie hated my face and even by the end of the campaign, Gerard Deulofeu was still telling me that I lacked the credibility to give him tactical instructions.

But look at me now. A top four manager. A man in the ascendency. When big jobs open up, it’s my name that’s mentioned. Seriously.

Juventus won the Champions League, but finished fourth in Serie A and so they pulled a Del Bosque and sacked their manager. I was immediately linked with the role. Unai Emery got the job in the end (obviously I didn’t apply) but that saw me linked with the now vacant Paris St Germain job. I didn’t apply for that either. But I did enjoy the media reports.

I’ll be sticking around with Everton for now. If someone directly offers me a job, that’s one thing. But I won’t be applying for anything. There’s a lot of work to be done around here. Key players are leaving and there’s no money yet to replace them.

But let’s start by reviewing last season’s performance, department by department.

We used three goalkeepers last season and they all did absolutely fine. Poor old Maarten Stekelenberg would still be the number one now were it not for his slipped disc, but he’s 34 and so he’ll be a backup for now. Joel Robles came in and did a job, but there is some interest in him, so I may just take the money if it’s offered and then pick up a free transfer as a third option. Alfie Areola had the lowest average rating, but he’s definitely the best goalkeeper and he’s improving all the time, so I am happy with this department.

We were very lucky with our defenders last season. Domagoj Vida and Ramiro Funes Mori played almost every game, denying our opponents the welcome sight of Ashley Williams and the soon-to-retire Phil Jagielka. If I can keep hold of Vida and Funes Mori, we’ll be just fine. That may be easier said than done though. Assuming they stay, we’ll look to Brendan Galloway, who did well on loan at West Bromwich Albion last season, and Matthew Pennington from the U23s for support.

On the right, I am happy with Seamus Coleman and Rick Karsdorp, though more than one assist from the pair would have been nice. There’s more work required on the other side though because Leighton Baines is off to the US, so I need a new first choice left-back and then we’ll keep one of Bryan Oviedo or Luke Garbutt in reserve. Enric Saborit, bought for £300k as an emergency option last summer, is off to Cardiff for £600k after being found wanting.

Everything depends on our midfield. Ross Barkley was incredible all year around and I really hope Manchester City don’t make a bid for him as I’ll have to accept it because of that panicked agreement on the last day of the season. There’s no chance of keeping Gerard Deulofeu though; Paris St Germain are circling. And they’re welcome to him, the ungrateful bastard. Aiden McGeady has returned to the club after a loan spell at Preston. I’m not convinced that he’s what we’re after, but in the absence of spending money he will have to do behind Aaron Lennon.

I’m happy enough about the heart of the midfield. James McCarthy and Idrissa Gueye are consistent and only occasionally violent. Tom Davies did not disgrace himself and Andrea Poli’s late heroics ensure that he’ll stay in the mix. Liam Walsh and Kieran Dowell will be promoted from the U23s to bolster our numbers.

We desperately need a new left winger. We should have bought Filip Kostic in January, I will redouble my efforts in July. James McClean is a good back-up option, but nothing more than that.

The biggest question mark is up front. Romelu Lukaku is the calibre of striker required, but his tantrums and poor form nearly cost us the entire campaign. To make matters worse, all interest in him seems to have dried up. For now, he’ll play the supporting role to Oumar Niasse, of whom there should be a statue in the car park. We also welcome back Shani Tarashaj from a loan spell in the Bundesliga. He’s got a little bit about him, so he’ll stick around in the first team squad while we assess him.

I like to build a club in the right order. I’ve already bought a goalkeeper, a right-back, and a centre-back, so left-back is my top priority. I’ve been tracking young Kieran Tierney at Celtic for a while now, along with Liverpool and Manchester City. But as they seem to have lost interest, I sweep in with a £10m bid and make him my own.

We open up our pre-season campaign with a 3-0 win over Sturm Graz, two goals for Lennon and one for this Tarashaj character. We have a month until the start of the season. We need one left winger, one right winger and possibly someone else. The real work starts now…

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